Checklists for Conservaturds
Find out if joining the GOP cult is right for you.
Republicans are fearful of facts, repulsed by reason, and horrified by human decency. There are many reasons for this. Some were born mentally challenged, while others were beaten as children. All were raised inside a blizzard of lies.
When GOPers spawn, their offspring grow up in a household full of religiosity, which means the kiddos witness hypocrisy, condescension, intolerance, and willful ignorance on a regular basis.
Lack of Education…
As is often said, “Remove education from society and Republicans take over.” Consider:
Cons think dinosaurs and humans existed at the same time
Cons believe Jeebus helped write the U.S. Constitution
Cons worship greed
Cons are frightened of skin with higher amounts of melanin
Cons deny humanity’s damage to the environment
Cons think a retail ad icon called Santa Claus is (1) white and (2) real
Cons don’t recognize that Fox News is traitorous propaganda
Cons don’t believe in reading
Cons don’t believe in education
Cons don’t believe in science
Cons don’t believe in democracy
13 Werds about Hoam Skuulling…
Combining religious delusion with fascism is a double dose of douchebaggery likely to harm any child. (Yeah, it’s 16 words, but I’m doing GOP math.)
Sloth…
GOPers may make a lot of noise, but they are mired in cerebral sloth. After all, math, science, history, civics, and English all require effort. Fairytales are easier than reality. And, as any Republican will tell you, “Facts are for liberals.”
Infesting our Government…
The evil of Conservatism spreads exponentially when their morally bereft candidates get elected. First, domestic terror groups like ALEC (American Legislative Exchange Council) write racist and regressive laws. Next, they distribute their garbage legislation to treason-weasels across the country. Then, the right-wing nut-jobs slap their names on the bills, and voila: Instant Fascism.
Checklist for Conservatism…
You can perform a self-assessment to see if you fit in with the odious GOP cult. Conservatives are:
Racist
Homophobic
Misogynistic
Greedy
Condescending
Xenophobic
Unwilling to reason
Unwilling to accept facts
Unwilling to think
Willing to protect pedophiles
In Sum:
Those who are sub-human enough to identify with the detritus of the GOP can now sit back and relax! As a rethuglican, all you need to do is genuflect to the almighty dollar, Sieg Heil the flag, and vote for conservaturds who pass anti-democratic legislation.